Old as Dirt
Although I carry AARP identification and I happily read the newsletters and magazines they send to my attention, I have yet to pull the card out and use it for a discount of any kind. This, my dears, will soon change. If I am to retire in two years, I must start saving pennies right this minute. My goodness, coffee is $9.00 a can and gasoline $4.00 a gallon and I must have both to survive.
One of the retail shops in Kalispell offers 15% discounts to seniors on designated Wednesdays. I'm going to mark my calendar accordingly and make a list. I'm aware that they offer cookies and coffee at the door, and that motivates me to put on mascara and drive eight miles into town.
I carry an AARP card but I don't look like the seniors of yesteryear. Today I wear a black and white striped top, hoop earrings, size 8 jeans and my fragrance of choice is CK Summer One. I drive a hunter green Jeep, fire a 9m Glock at the range, and listen to Kid Rock. I do a little dance, make a little love and party on. You see, I never wanted to grow up to be the little old lady of Pasadena. I am young at heart and my hazel eyes still sparkle no matter the challenges in my life.
A real woman (in my opinion) has the ability to look into a magnifying mirror and simply disregard crow’s feet; parentheses around the mouth; sun freckles on the nose; age spots in the middle of the forehead. Let’s maximize the positive and ignore the obvious. Growing older sucks and I hate any phrase that has the following blurb in it: “Due to the aging process you can expect blah, blah and blah.”
I look good! I use magic potions on my face at night, and mineral powder in the daylight hours. Although my eyes may crinkle like Mrs. Clause on a good day, at least I have my own teeth. There’s makeup to camouflage dark circles under my eyes; support panties to keep my muffin-top in; Levi’s that offer a slimming panel for my caboose. I’m here to tell you that women over fifty have options.
I'm due to turn the big six zero and I’m just now starting to blossom. I part my hair on the side after years of spiking it up. I changed the style and color of my everyday eyeglasses. On occasion I’ll wear green eye shadow and liner in an effort to get away from my everyday lilac. I brush my eyebrows carefully so they stand at attention to give my face a youthful inquisitive look. I use a lip plumper on my sliver of a top lip, and a blush called Glee so I can look young and fresh again.
It’s called tricks - smoke - and mirrors. But I’m here to say I’m not going to give up, and I’m not going to throw the towel in. In the end it’s about attitude, hope, and acceptance. I think I ROCK as a baby boomer and I do feel attractive, though not secure enough to wear a hot pink t-shirt that shouts Sexy Grandma.
I hope I can continue to see the good in me; the wisdom of aging; and accept that I can never go back. But I must admit I enjoy looking at pictures of Ja’Nee at age 19 with a flat tummy; waist-length hair; smooth baby skin and eyes that had yet to see the world.
I’m a proud middle-aged woman with three grandchildren and a much younger husband. I laugh at myself and life-in-general, and if you promise me a caramel latte I’ll tell you how much I weigh. I'm here to say I can’t wait to see where my Montana journey takes me.
Not so bad for a woman who carries an AARP card and wears bifocals.
One of the retail shops in Kalispell offers 15% discounts to seniors on designated Wednesdays. I'm going to mark my calendar accordingly and make a list. I'm aware that they offer cookies and coffee at the door, and that motivates me to put on mascara and drive eight miles into town.
I carry an AARP card but I don't look like the seniors of yesteryear. Today I wear a black and white striped top, hoop earrings, size 8 jeans and my fragrance of choice is CK Summer One. I drive a hunter green Jeep, fire a 9m Glock at the range, and listen to Kid Rock. I do a little dance, make a little love and party on. You see, I never wanted to grow up to be the little old lady of Pasadena. I am young at heart and my hazel eyes still sparkle no matter the challenges in my life.
A real woman (in my opinion) has the ability to look into a magnifying mirror and simply disregard crow’s feet; parentheses around the mouth; sun freckles on the nose; age spots in the middle of the forehead. Let’s maximize the positive and ignore the obvious. Growing older sucks and I hate any phrase that has the following blurb in it: “Due to the aging process you can expect blah, blah and blah.”
I look good! I use magic potions on my face at night, and mineral powder in the daylight hours. Although my eyes may crinkle like Mrs. Clause on a good day, at least I have my own teeth. There’s makeup to camouflage dark circles under my eyes; support panties to keep my muffin-top in; Levi’s that offer a slimming panel for my caboose. I’m here to tell you that women over fifty have options.
I'm due to turn the big six zero and I’m just now starting to blossom. I part my hair on the side after years of spiking it up. I changed the style and color of my everyday eyeglasses. On occasion I’ll wear green eye shadow and liner in an effort to get away from my everyday lilac. I brush my eyebrows carefully so they stand at attention to give my face a youthful inquisitive look. I use a lip plumper on my sliver of a top lip, and a blush called Glee so I can look young and fresh again.
It’s called tricks - smoke - and mirrors. But I’m here to say I’m not going to give up, and I’m not going to throw the towel in. In the end it’s about attitude, hope, and acceptance. I think I ROCK as a baby boomer and I do feel attractive, though not secure enough to wear a hot pink t-shirt that shouts Sexy Grandma.
I hope I can continue to see the good in me; the wisdom of aging; and accept that I can never go back. But I must admit I enjoy looking at pictures of Ja’Nee at age 19 with a flat tummy; waist-length hair; smooth baby skin and eyes that had yet to see the world.
I’m a proud middle-aged woman with three grandchildren and a much younger husband. I laugh at myself and life-in-general, and if you promise me a caramel latte I’ll tell you how much I weigh. I'm here to say I can’t wait to see where my Montana journey takes me.
Not so bad for a woman who carries an AARP card and wears bifocals.