Spring Cleaning Surrounds Me

I am driven to succeed. I will plan, push, pant to get my tasks done. I will clean the house - wash two loads of laundry - write out nine household bills - read the paper - clean the cat box - brush the dog - fry a chicken. I would even bake a pie if I wasn't so tired.

I cannot leave well enough alone. No one but me sees the dust. No one but me sorts, washes and folds the clothes. I'm the responsible one that pays the bills on time, reads the entire Sunday newspaper, cleans up after kitty and chases the dog with a hair brush. Cooking duties are shared in our home, but it's always the female (that would be me) that does the clean-up.

Why is it that I can't sit still for 30-minutes and just breathe, listen to music or read a magazine? I'm always doing the multi-tasking mambo. I think I'll listen to a favorite CD then find myself with a duster in hand. I open a book that I discovered on a clearance table at Costco, start reading the first chapter when the clothes dryer timer goes off.

I am tired of trying to get it all done. I would love to unplug the phone, put the husband in the garage, the cat in the utility room and lock the dog in the master bedroom. I dream of lighting a candle and staying in the same room long enough to smell it. I'm like a long legged pony at the gate and wanting to be let out to run with the wind in her face.

Could it be I'm just older now and have less energy? Could it be I'm emotionally drained and cannot take one more drama in my life? I need a time out. I need room service. I need to throw the bills in the air and have someone else play pick-up.

Its times like these that I crave booze, a back rub, then total silence from all directions. I've come to the conclusion that living a full life is tiring. I'd rather be three and playing in the park.

Well, my ranting is complete. I will now run a bubble bath, paste vitamin C night cream on my face, light a candle, put on clean pajamas and get ready to watch Total Divas. Maybe their hectic days and passionate nights will bring me some solace.